Since the midnight release of Taylor Swift’s twelfth studio album, ‘The Life of a Showgirl’, the twelve-song work has immediately become a topic of conversation for Swifties and beyond. With features from Sabrina Carpenter and production by industry legends Max Martin and Shellback, the album was rumored to be a ‘glitter-gel-pen’ style hit, with hard-hitting lyrics and great musicality – but did it deliver?

THE FATE OF OPHELIA – 10/10

The first track on ‘The Life of a Showgirl’ is the ‘Fate of Ophelia’, with a run-time of 3:47. It’s one of the longer songs on the album, but uses each one of those seconds to produce a beautiful love song and incredible album opener/lead single. Even with its references to Shakespeare’s ‘Hamlet’ – a seemingly ‘Tortured Poets’ move; it defies expectations and turns Ophelia’s tragic fate into a pop power-ballad about the one and only Travis Kelce. With its incredible instrumental, witty lyricism, and stunning vocals, ‘The Fate of Ophelia’ deserves nothing less than a 10/10.

ELIZABETH TAYLOR – 7/10

This old-Hollywood-glamor inspired track is one that I personally had high hopes for. A gorgeous song about escapism and falling in love, ‘Elizabeth Taylor’ delivers a quick one-two punch for listeners when coupled with ‘The Fate of Ophelia’. It’s a true ‘look behind the curtain’, as Taylor said the album would be, about both her relationship with Travis Kelce and her time out of the spotlight. My only complaint? The song feels repetitive.  Partly because of its  one-to-many choruses and the dragging metaphors that start to get tiring  towards the end of the song’s three-minute runtime. But with that in mind, I’d give ‘Elizabeth Taylor’ a 7/10. 

OPALITE – 8/10

This dance-pop anthem is so quintessentially ‘Showgirl’. A clever nod to Travis yet again, with Opal being his birthstone, it’s a track about stripping off your baggage and opening yourself up to love. My personal favorite lyric, “failure brings you freedom”, is a perfect way to describe this song. This song feels personal, with more nods to Swift’s family and the recurring idea that with every failed relationship, you can always take steps in the right direction. It’s beautiful and bejeweled, now that Taylor’s finally being unapologetically and loudly in love. ‘Opalite’ is radical joy, and for that, I’d rate it an 8/10.

FATHER FIGURE – 6/10

From the get-go, I had high expectations for this track. Named after and interpolating the instrumental of George Micheals 80s hit ‘Father Figure’, I was assuming this track would be, well… a little raunchier? Taylor’s song, although similarly named, doesn’t deliver on the romance front. A song about making a name for yourself in the music industry and knowing your worth, it’s just not what I come to Swift’s music for. I won’t go so far as to say the song is bad, but it’s so specific to her own experiences that it’s difficult to relate to. She sounds great on the track and the production is top notch, but I was expecting a ‘Vigilante S**t’ style record and got something much more similar to ‘The Man’. Overall, it’s not a bad track once you separate it from the original song, but it doesn’t fully deliver– leading ‘Father Figure’ to get a respectable 6/10.

ELDEST DAUGHTER – 4/10

I’ll start this by saying that there is so much of me that wants to love this song. However, now that ‘Eldest Daughter’ has joined the ranks of Swift’s catalogue of iconic track fives, I’m not sure if this one can hold its own. Although there’s a few lyrical gems in the song, like the line “every eldest daughter is the first lamb to the slaughter” that showcases the more vulnerable side of the song, I can’t deny that the rest of the lyrics aren’t the best. With a myriad of slightly odd internet references, ‘fire fits’ and being ‘savage’, ‘Eldest Daughter’ is a song that felt dated after the first listen. Although she sounds pretty good on this record, and the underlying themes of safety and security in her relationships really make me want to like this piece, , I can’t help but cringe a bit whenever the chorus comes on. Reluctantly, I have to give ‘Eldest Daughter’ a 4/10.

RUIN THE FRIENDSHIP – 9/10

‘Ruin the Friendship’ is a song that hits like a punch to the stomach. Written about a high-school friend who passed away young, the song itself is a beautiful tribute to living in the moment. With mentions to Taylor’s long-time best friend Abigail of ‘Fifteen’ fame and a ‘Dear Reader’ style fourth wall break, ‘Ruin the Friendship’ is everything and nothing all at once. Truthfully, this is why I listen to Taylor Swift – her music is like a hug from the big sister I’ve never had. Her sweet and simple advice to ‘ruin the friendship’ and not live in regret is picturesque and perfect, and the song’s effortless storytelling and soft melody make ‘Ruin the Friendship’ an incredible 9/10.

ACTUALLY ROMANTIC – 6/10

The title alluding to Charli XCX’s ‘Everything is Romantic’, this seemingly not-so-subtle diss at Charli after the Brat summer spotlight has waned is adding fuel to an already heated fire. Though the pair publicly deny any animosity between each other, a mixture of strange comments from Charli about Swift’s fans and the pairs incredibly public relationships with men in the band ‘The 1975’, fans have speculated that there’s drama behind the scenes – and if the drugged-up gossip Taylor describes in her song is Charli, it’s a lot worse than we thought. Some fans speculate that this track is also targeted at critics of Swift, but either way, it’s song full of crazy lyrics, wild callbacks, and behind-the-scenes drama. I’d have to give this song a solid 6/10. The shock value is incredible, but I doubt ‘Actually Romantic’ will stand the test of time the way other tracks from this album will.

WI$H LI$T – 7/10

With punchy lyrics and a relatable message, ‘Wi$h Li$t’ is an incredibly fun track only hindered by production that doesn’t fully commit to the song. My issues here lie not with Taylor, but with Max Martin and Shellback – this song is deserving of a better beat and sound than the one it already has. The song itself is fun, and when you analyze the lyrics it reveals a story about priorities, goals, and love at the center of it all… and yet, I just can’t get over the beat. For my own personal hangups and my questions about the production, I’d have to give ‘WI$H LI$T’ a 7/10. 

WOOD – 6/10

The ninth song on ‘The Life of a Showgirl’, this track leaves nothing to the imagination. Full of innuendos, witty lyrics, and references to the one-and-only Travis Kelce, ‘Wood’ is an – albeit slightly uncomfortable – celebration of Swift’s new found confidence and her relationship with Kelce. Although Taylor herself sounds great and I enjoy the production, a few of the lyrics do make me want to press the ‘skip’ button. This track feels like an attempt at matching the energy of some other pop icons like  Sabrina Carpenter, but I’m not sure if it’s something I want or need from Swift – if I wanted Sabrina, I’d listen to Sabrina. Overall, it’s not a bad track, but I’d be hard-pressed to rate it any higher than a 6/10.

CANCELLED! – 8/10

‘CANCELLED!’ is a song that revels in controversy and delights in scandal. Hard-hitting lyrics wrapped in a pop exterior bring me back to the ‘Reputation’ era, but these lyrics feel more poignant. It’s a song that hooks you with its first intensely  beautiful verse and keeps you hanging on. Despite controversy online surrounding the song and its potential insensitivity to the current political climate, I don’t believe it to be in bad taste – from Sophie Turner’s public divorce from Joe Jonas to Sabrina Carpenter’s ‘Man’s Best Friend’ cover, Taylor does seem to like her friends ‘cancelled’ (even if there’s no real base for the claims being made). It’s an apolitical, well-done satire, and deserves an 8/10.

HONEY – 5/10

Being  one of the weaker songs on the album, ‘Honey’ isn’t necessarily bad – just unmemorable. Truthfully, it feels like filler–  and despite some good lyrics about how her relationship with Travis is redefining her failed relationships in the past (with some particular mentions of the lead singer of ‘The 1975’ Matty Healy),  it just doesn’t perform well enough to justify a higher ranking. Her vocals are good, but they don’t particularly stand out, the production is fine, but nothing to write home about, and for every nice lyric, there’s one that feels unnecessary. It’s background noise to what is otherwise a good album, and deserves a ranking of 5/10. Not good, not bad – just unmemorable. 

THE LIFE OF A SHOWGIRL – 7/10

With a Sabrina Carpenter feature, this title track was one I had been waiting for since the day the tracklist dropped. However, I have to say- Sabrina does do the heavy lifting on this song in a way I wasn’t expecting. It feels like Taylor wrote this song with Sabrina in mind, not herself, and it reflects in the music. Although I like the song, particularly the lyrics “I took her pearls of wisdom, hung them from my neck, I paid  my dues with every bruise, I knew what to expect”, it doesn’t stand out from some of the other tracks on this album. Maybe it’s  the lyrics, or maybe it’s the almost musical-theatre style of the song, but either way, I just don’t love it. The Sabrina Carpenter verse and vocals alone gets it a 7/10, but it’s in spite of Taylor’s part, not because of it.

MY AVERAGE RANKING – 6/10

‘The Life of a Showgirl’ is, at its core, a celebration of new beginnings. From its upbeat pop songs to its introspective anthems, it’s an album that perfectly encapsulates Taylor’s life post-Eras-Tour. For the first time in a long time, Taylor is happy, and you can see and hear it throughout all of her songs. 

Overall, my ‘Showgirl’ ranking is a 6/10. I won’t lie and say it’s my favorite thing she’s ever made, or even that the lyrical or musical quality is necessarily as high as albums in the past, but it is everything it needs to be. It’s the delicate balance of public and private, the unapologetic love she has for her fiance, and the celebration of everything that’s got Taylor where she is today that makes her a true Showgirl.